Animal Communicator动物通讯

Article source: http://www.kabish.com/ . 文章来源： http://www.kabish.com/ 。 Used with author's permission. 用作者的许可。

I have a business card burning a hole in my Rolodex.我有一个名片烧了一个洞，我Rolodex 。 It's from an animal communicator.这是从一种动物沟通。 Someone who allegedly interprets mental pictures from animals.据称，有人解释谁心理图片从动物。 I love my dog dearly.我爱我的狗的代价。 He communicates with very expressive eyes and I don't seem to have much trouble" getting" him.他传达了非常表情的眼睛，我似乎并没有很多麻烦“让”他。 But because I'm so attached to him I've been toying with the idea of going that step further to find out what's really in his mind.但是，因为我很重视他，我一直在酝酿的想法，这一步骤将进一步找出真正在心头。 So why don't I?那么，为什么不是我？

Well.好。 Some givens going into the situation.一些吉文进入状况。 What goes on in dog's heads is important to them.什么不用在狗的首长是重要的。 They're not likely to give you a tip on the fifth at Santa Anita.他们可能不会给你一个冰山上的第五次在圣塔安尼塔。 They think about food, toys, other dogs.他们认为，食品，玩具，其他狗。 And although I'm not quite sure how the process works I don't think it's like Karnak the Magician where you can ask questions.虽然我不能肯定如何工作的过程我不认为这就像卡纳克魔术师您可以在这里提问。

But back to why I don't just call the number and set up an appointment.但是，回到我为什么不只是电话的数量和设立了一个任命。

Maybe I'm not sure I want to know what my dog thinks of me or what goes on in his head.也许我不知道我想知道我的狗认为我或事情在他的人头。 After all he is privy to all our secrets.毕竟他是枢密院我们所有的秘密。

I once read a story, supposedly true, about a cat that peed on his owner's bed every Sunday morning and at no other time.我曾经阅读一个故事，理应如此，对猫高速他的主人的床上每个星期日上午在没有其他时间。 His mommy called in an animal communicator who asked the cat why he peed on the bed every Sunday.他的妈妈要求在动物沟通谁问他为什么猫高速床上每个星期日。 The cat replied that when mommy left the house to go to Church some other woman came in with her husband and they both booted him out of the bedroom.猫回答说，当妈妈离开家去教会其他一些女人与她的丈夫和他们都引导他走出卧室。 So he took a leak just to screw with them.于是，他泄露了只螺钉他们。

This may be an urban legend like the poodle in the microwave.这可能是一个城市像传说中的狮子狗的微波。 But it sure makes you think twice about animal ESP.

I wonder what my boy would say about us to total strangers.我不知道我的孩子会说我们总陌生人。

" My mommy drinks wine sometimes and gets sad when daddy goes out? Daddy looks at pictures of naked ladies on the Internet when mommy goes to yoga class. They watch way too much TV. It hurts my ears". “我的妈妈有时喝葡萄酒和悲伤时，得到爸爸出门？爸爸看到照片，赤裸裸的各位在互联网上时，妈妈去瑜珈班。方式，他们观看电视太多。疼我的耳朵” 。

And how do they say anything?以及如何他们说什么？ Do they use words?难道他们使用的词语？ How can they say they like peanut butter if they don't know that peanut butter is called peanut butter.他们怎么能说他们喜欢的花生酱如果他们不知道，花生酱被称为花生酱。 To them it's a pill delivery product.他们这是一个药丸交付产品。

I know that my dog adores me.我知道，我的狗喜欢我。 I believe it's unconditional.我相信这是无条件的。 But what if I found out that what he was really thinking as he was jumping up at me as I came through the door was "You jerk, you left me alone for five hours and I've got to pee like a racehorse."但是，如果我发现他所说的是真的，他跳起来在我通过我的大门是“你成绩，你离开我独自5个小时，我得撒尿像赛马。 ” Little though he is he has the heart of a lion if he thinks I'm being threatened.虽然他小，他的心的狮子，他认为如果我受到威胁。 But what if what he really felt was "I can't believe I've got to step up AGAIN to get between you and this weird looking bum. Don't you know better than to open the door to just anyone!"但是，如果他真正感受到“我不能相信我得加紧再次让你和这个奇怪的期待烧伤。难道你不知道优于开放的大门刚刚任何人！ ”

I've been racking my brain trying to think of some human benefit from the limited amount of interspecies communication we've had so far.我一直在货架我的脑子想尝试一些人受益于有限数量的间的沟通，我们已经迄今。 We were able to train dolphins to mine harbors so I guess you could say that that benefits us.我们能够训练海豚扫雷港口，所以我猜你可以说，我们的利益。 But weren't some of them blown up in the process?但是，没有其中一些炸毁的过程中？ So, not so good for them.所以，不太好他们。 What about poor KoKo.什么穷人科科。 Have we treated gorillas any better since we discovered they could experience bereavement and sadness?我们对待任何更好的大猩猩，因为我们发现他们可以和丧亲经验悲伤？

Ultimately, what it may come down to is that I love my dog, and all animals, precisely because I can't communicate with him in any kind of human way.归根结底，它可能会下降到的是，我爱我的狗，和所有动物，正是因为我无法沟通，他在任何类型的人类之中。 I don't need to reason with him; make a case; persuade him; or be critiqued on my wardrobe.我不需要他的理由，使案件;说服他;或critiqued我的衣柜。 I tell him what I want him to do and sometimes he actually does it.我告诉他我想他这样做，有时他实际上它。 He tells me what he needs and he gets it.他告诉我他需要什么，他得到它。 We have a pretty good system.我们有一个非常好的制度。 If it ain't broke why fix it?如果不打破，为什么修复？

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